Sad, Miss You, Love You.

from sunday[28feb]morning till now, so much things happen. so much so much. now my heart is so hurt so pain. my mind is so messy, full of all stuff. found out jason betray mi again, but why? why Again? and the 3rd party was exson, i really cant imagine how they can be so lovely together. found out that yun wai and ryan knows about this long time ago had been hiding it from mi, dun wanna hurt mi? but im still being hurt now. all this really pulled my heart and body down. got weaker and weaker. had a long talk with jason on monday[1mar]midnight, but he seems tired. i have bring everything from my heart out to him. but at the end he just say im tired, need to sleep. T_T i really dun wanna drag this anymore. i wanna to go KL on 19night so i could meet him and also celebrate his birthday. but seem he doesnt want mi to go. am i really distrubing you and exson? i wanna settle things clear with you, how long you wanna hang there. just stick to one person and throw the other one away. if you really dun love mi, not interested in mi, find mi irritating. please tell mi so and i will leave your life forever. dun be afraid of hurting mi, it doesnt make any differents to mi anymore, cause im already been hurt. i dun wanna hear you saying you are far from mi, you hurt mi so much, you are not a good bf to mi. than are you a good bf to exson? so much things happen, but no matter what. i still love you. i wan you to be my bf, i know you are a good guy, you can change. i will keep on giving you chance, i wont give up on you. but i dunno why you could ren xin to do all this to mi. i dun wish you to be so fan everyday, so settle things with mi and i will leave the both of you alone. you will never see or hear ethan ng again. by the way, thanks for making ethan as my name, i love this. so please reply and dun drag. your birthday is coming, i want you to celebrate it happily with the one that you choose. thanks jason for the past, you really care and love mi and change mi to a better person. i love you so much.